Ok just thinking of making this a note cause I'm nervous to open this can.
So I'm going to jump in quick into the cold water.
I don't like what I currently weigh. I am heavier that I've ever been in my whole life. I'm guessing because I don't use a scale most ever, that I clock in at about 215 right now. I am 5'6" (and shrinking). I am uncomfortable, tired and not wearing the fun clothes I love. Shoes have become my obsession due to this. Can't go wrong with buying shoes!
To all my sweet friends and fans who NEVER seem to mention how much more I weigh than I used to, thank you my loves but we know, that I know, that you know. You just love me a lot and I love you too.
So I've decided to focus on getting back to me and that just starts with being in my skin. I'm just going to show up and notice, forgive and love me and watch my body tell me what it needs. Our bodies are fully capable of healing themselves if we listen and do as they say. Including exercising by dancing if that's what momma's body wants! If my body says it wants pizza, wine and cheese, then we're going to have to have a sit down talk about why. Maybe, mostly something is hurting and it needs to get out.
This body is strong, with great feet (very symmetrical), strong/expressive hands, big eyes that I have willed to be more green than brown (I swear I willed them since I was 8yrs old and looked in a mirror and said "I want my eyes to be green"). This body has danced, run, walked, had amazing sex, had a baby, rarely is sick, requires no medication at 52 (which I think is amazing), withstood a handful of years of major panic, depression and grief.
So I guess you could say my plan is to realize, get back to and be with me, listen for the healthy words and move back into this body with pride! Dammit I'm too sexy for my shirt!
For anyone going through something similar please write me and tell so I don't feel alone. (firstname.lastname@example.org). If you want a coaching session around this topic, you know you're getting someone walking this shit now and am so glad to hold hands and be in it with you! (www.carrieakrecreative.com) I'm here for you!
Love you guys!